Buried in Christmas

I have buried myself in Christmas. I found no other way to crawl out of the darkness that I found myself in than to hurl myself, head first, into the madness that is the Christmas Season. There was shopping to be finished at busy stores bursting with other shoppers who had no idea where I had been. I could hide within them and forget that I have thought of anything else but the present moment.

There was the hunt for the elusive Santa Clause, frequenting the mall with the children in hopes to catch a moment on his lap and whisper to him their sweetest dreams. There are 4 AM wake up calls that beckon me to "Santa's Workshop" to wrap a few gifts before the kids wake up.

There are piano recitals, dinners, and Christmas parties. There are Winter Concerts and presentations at the schools, parent observation nights at the dance studio, and even an afternoon at the ballet enjoying The Nutcracker.

There is time with my son and Christmas dinner to plan and shop for. With a schedule like this, who has time to think? This is precisely my purpose. I had to stop thinking in order to throw a rope into the bottomless hole that I was falling into. The frenzy of the holidays certainly keeps me from thinking. If I am an ostrich, then Christmas is my sand.

I don't know where I will find myself emotionally when I emerge in January, but for now, I am well distracted and enjoying this rare moment of peace on what is luminary night in my neighborhood.

Silent night, holy night...