A person high on cocaine feels like everything is right with the world, and everything that they set out to do will work out. They make elaborate plans and have every intention of acting on them, because all will work out well. They are very enthusiastic and optimistic about life in general and cannot see why they ever doubted anything or anyone...for that brief moment during which they are high. When the cocaine wears off, nothing is as wonderful as it seemed just a moment ago. The person may start to feel desperate, and everything is a big disappointment.
This is how my marriage is. There are times when I am so enthusiastic about things working out. I make plans. I think that if I compromise in this way and am kinder in another way, something will give and we can start to have a good marriage. We might even enjoy each other's company...and then he speaks or acts, and everything comes crumbling down like the Mighty Cocaine High crashing down from it's peak. Then I realize all the reasons why I want to leave.
I have no words here, I really don't know what to say. All I can say is that I give you love, and hope that things are better now than they were here. Im sorry if you reply and I do not respond, I do not get notifications of your response and I forget which posts I comment on. Love and hugs from across the pond. MMS xx
ReplyDeleteThanks all the same :)
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